You should eat some of that makeup, so you can be pretty on the inside. . 26+ Funny Responses to Being Asked on a Date (Replying Yes or No), 31+ Good Comebacks to Use in an Argument With a Girl, Roommate Is Always in Living Room (How To Resolve This), Roommate Brings Unwanted Guests Home! Aeldrion 5 yr. ago. If youre going to be two-faced, you could at least make one of them pretty. More like give me a sign that you're still alive. 15. I dont know how you do it, but after a shower, you look even greasier. You know when you go to meet some friends, or friends of your friends, or to a party or whatever, when you meet someone new, at some point people ask you: "SO WHAT DO YOU DO FOR A LIVING?" And what I wanted to do in this thread is list the craziest answers that you can give, you know, shock people or create an extremely awkard moment. Humans are very complex creatures, but we're also creatures of habit who say one thing when we mean another. OK, so now at least you should have some idea of how to respond if your ex texts you out of the blue. 18. Well, seeing as you care, how long do you have? If you're going to be two-faced, you could at least make one of them pretty. You can fire back with a witty and flirty response. Moving in with Roommates? This is another funny response that you can use to say that you did a little something different this morning. (Say it like he or. This is perhaps not for the faint-hearted. 10. My bad, its just your mouth. 2. Or you could be humorous back at them and say "No, I'm not. I'm sorry I hurt your feelings when I called you stupid. The truth is, if you really want to get him back, you should follow the steps outlined here.. Hi! 17. Get the very best of LovePanky straight to your inbox! 91. Living the dream! No, I'm Finnish. 35. [Read: 20 wise medieval insults you could bring back into trend]. 7. But, if you do say it, it will highlight the problem. What's your sign? The fact youve replied at all has come as a shock. 3. I repeat I am plural! I favour the "How am I what?" You sure have a bodacious rackfor a guy. If your best friends are worrying about you due to your new break up, this one you can use to make them feel relaxed. via: Pexels / George Pak. For a prankster, though, street signs or a note out in public is an easy opportunity to get a guaranteed audience for their smart . It may come across as insensitive, but that's just how our current world works. Check out the following infographic for some practical tips to maintain a conversation and take it forward.SaveIllustration: StyleCraze Design Team. Funny Responses to "What Are You Doing?" What does it look like I'm doing? How do you get it to curl out of your nostrils like that? I agree, thanks for sharing. Maybe I am a kindergartner? (Heres What To Do), Roommate Sleeps in Living Room All The Time! 14. By acting as though they are replying too fast, you highlight the fact that they are replying too slow. 84. Through humorous musings about Scalia's . If I was any better, vitamins would be taking me. I dont blame you, Ive had it up to my neck with annoying, repetitive, shallow everyday questions and I often respond with something funny, silly, or sarcastic to make it known. Funny Answers to How Are You Doing? Because no one worthy has beaten me yet in a card fight! Phil lives in England, UK, and has around 20 years experience as a professional life, career and executive coach. 74. Everyday that you're on the right side of the grass is a good day. 86. 2023 BDG Media, Inc. All rights reserved. Heart-shattering. Don Draper? Get your own life first before you try sharing it. You just live. Thats because my crush is a fictional character. 10. If laughter is the best medicine, your face must be curing the world. As for me, I cant even afford honey! I'm overqualified! Good luck feel free to drop me a comment below if you have any funny responses I should add to the list, and do let me know if you get any memorable responses back. Thats because theres no vacancy in my heart. Mark Twain (author), "I like sleeping; it's like death without the commitment." Shane from The L Word? Maybe this person really likes you, and they have a heart condition. Oh, a thought crossed your mind? 67. After all, every single day that you're still alive is a good day overall. If ugliness was measured in bricks, I would be the Great Wall of China. 56. You may join me, though. [Read: The step-by-step guide to being a funny person and make everyone love your company]. You have an old soul. 1. Are you Jamaican? Here's the good news: I've collected plenty of answer options for you to make that unbearably awkward question a little more bearable. This person is taking so long to reply, you will be waiting for geology to change before you get one. Cookie Notice Let's face itat my age, I'm very pleased to be anywhere." George Burns (comedian) "The trouble with quotes about death is that 99.9% of them are made by people who are still alive." Joshua Burns. I get my daily paper, look at the obituaries page and if Im not there, I carry on as usual. Patrick Moore (astronomer), He is one of those people who would be enormously improved by death. HH Munro (author), My father was from Aberdeen, and a more generous man you couldnt wish to meet. Because Im awkward and ugly. . Like are you asking because you really wanna hear whats up?. 94. I cant complain, not that anyone listens anyway. But still, some people will try to satisfy their curiosity and meddle with your personal life. Come on, now I want you to whisper that question slowly to my ear. 5. - Anonymous. Oof, gotta hide! I'm glad to know that you're alive.". [Read: How to be funny and make people love your company]. If you are, then maybe were meant to be! 41. I Don't Miss, I Kiss A sweet bit of poetry that sounds super romantic. 2. Otherwise, we would still be with them today. I cant afford to die; Id lose too much money. George Burns (comedian), I do not fear death. Everyone wants me, but no one dares! Maybe you can Google it. Great, but I should warn you that I am totally biased. Real may recognize real, but real also recognizes thoughtless people who don't deserve your time. I was doing great, before you came. conservation international ceo; little debbie peanut butter creme pies discontinued. Because Jamaican me crazy! I hope you like some of them. 16. And trust us, once you use these lines, everyone will be ooh-ing to your snarky comments the next time someone dares to make fun of you! 82. Once youre dead, youre made for life. Jimi Hendrix (musician), Death will be a great relief, no more interviews. Katharine Hepburn (actress), Death is a delightful hiding place for weary men. Herodotus (historian), You know youre old when the candles cost more than the cake. Bob Hope (comedian), Some men are alive simply because it is against the law to kill them. EW Howe (author), There are more dead people than living, and their numbers are increasing. Another excuse that people use is Im just hoping in the shower. Getting better with every passing second. Edgar A Shoaff (author), "Death is a very narrow theme, but it reaches a wide audience." "My level of sarcasm has gotten to a point where I don't even know if I am kidding anymore.". In fact, theyre taking too much of it. If there is just one valid reason for someone not replying to you, that reason would be their death. I firmly believe that a romantic relationship is a huge distraction. Who told you that? Hello, how are you? You want to make them laugh, not yell. There might be little things that go wrong throughout your life, but at least you're still living it. He will be missed. Here's one to use when you're having a spectacular day. 1. Then I hope you find someone whos good looking, honest, smart, and cultured. Just look what happened there! Looks like I overestimated the number of brain cells you have. Reproduction without explicit permission is prohibited. Acting like a prick doesnt make yours grow bigger. Whilst university does present some challenges, it does not mean you need to take several days to reply to a message.if(typeof ez_ad_units!='undefined'){ez_ad_units.push([[120,600],'grammarhow_com-large-leaderboard-2','ezslot_16',108,'0','0'])};__ez_fad_position('div-gpt-ad-grammarhow_com-large-leaderboard-2-0');if(typeof ez_ad_units!='undefined'){ez_ad_units.push([[120,600],'grammarhow_com-large-leaderboard-2','ezslot_17',108,'0','1'])};__ez_fad_position('div-gpt-ad-grammarhow_com-large-leaderboard-2-0_1');.large-leaderboard-2-multi-108{border:none!important;display:block!important;float:none!important;line-height:0;margin-bottom:15px!important;margin-left:auto!important;margin-right:auto!important;margin-top:15px!important;max-width:100%!important;min-height:600px;padding:0;text-align:center!important}. Sometimes, being emotional stops us from replying to the messages of others. Why do you ask? Im too expensive. Life is up to something. And it's time for me to make my escape. Youre not going to use the same response to your dad as you would your best friend, right? 96. If corporate email language won't do it, nothing will. Now you can be! I had promised myself I would murder the next person who asked me that question. Its better to be single with high standards than be in a relationship settling for less. As unlikely as this is, it might be wise to double-check. Funny Answers to "Why Are You Still Single?" Because no one worthy has beaten me yet in a card fight! StyleCraze provides content of general nature that is designed for informational purposes only. Then they throw dirt in your face. Rita Rudner (comedian), "When I die, I want my body to be donated for research, but more specifically, to a scientist who is working on bringing dead bodies back to life." 70. Im glad that I sleep so peacefully, knowing that Im single and aint nobody cheating on me tonight. Another way to say Still Alive? Without your thumbs, its unlikely you will be able to text anyone. If you're really feeling them, you can give them one last chance to make up for their communication lag. 62. If you've ever worked in an office, used municipal buildings or lived in a city, chances are, you already know what public notices are bland, dull, usually complaining and rarely funny posters that tell us somewhat useful information about all kinds of things. You'll be asked how you are almost every single day, which is why you should add some humor to your answers. However, you can check out some of our ideas if you want to shake things up and change how you respond to how are you?. Maybe because I clap my hands when the credits roll at the end of a movie? There are many other euphemisms you could use, though: Still ticking. 9. How are you? That's impossible. There are nosy people everywhere! Maybe because I have a Ph.D. in impatience. Keep asking and maybe one day youll get a sensible answer. WHAT DID THEY SAY?? Not sure why you're asking me my age. There is nothing wrong with responding with a funny or witty remark if youre getting annoyed with repetitive questions. Your email address will not be published. Im sorry. Youll never be even half the man your mother is. Average, I think, that sounds about right. 71. My lawyer has stated that I dont have to answer that question. Spiritually? I had been dead for billions of years before I was born and had not suffered the slightest inconvenience. Mark Twain (author), Im not afraid to die, I just dont want to be there when it happens. Woody Allen (comedian), The leading cause of death among fashion models is falling through street grates. Dave Barry (author), Always go to other peoples funerals, otherwise they wont come to yours. Yogi Berra (baseball player), Im very pleased to be here. Yep, thats about it just a confusing answer. Want to equip yourself with more responses? Scroll down! [deleted] 5 yr. ago. I dont have time to accommodate other human beings in my life! Have a nice life." This text is excellent because you are making him or her feel guilty about ghosting you. 73. My day was fine, it was everything else that was the problem. You speak as if youre not single yourself! Hope you're well". Do you want the short or the detailed version? Her sessions aim to bring about transformation in her clients lives, perspectives, and relationships. Nice and dandy, like cotton candy. You win the internet. Just standing here waiting for stupid questions I guess. What do you mean Im still single. They really care for you, and you better value their presence well. Oh, what a long list. 5. Sounds like effort to me. Tell them to stop being nosy and avoid answering. Here, there are hilarious replies, witty comebacks, flirty responses, and many other answers to this question. It looks a little too clingy and hard to maintain. Check out: Image credits Photo by Priscilla Du Preez on Unsplash. This one is good. provided, of course, that he really is dead." Her sessions aim to bring about transformation in her clients lives, perspectives, and relationships. 98. 4. You look tired. Take Your Time. Thats no excuse for treating someone like they dont exist, especially since 85% of participants said theyd rather be told upfront that someones not feeling it. Check-in later and well find out if I did or not. Best "How Are You?" Answers. Copyright 2011 - 2023 IncNut Stylecraze Private Limited. Sarcastic Captions for Instagram. [Read: 48 smart and sarcastic lines and quotes that kick ass!]. Im quite certain that Im single because I didnt forward those chain messages stating: forward this to 10 people and you will meet the love of your life in 10 days, or else you suffer bad luck in the past. The only way youll ever get laid is if you crawl up a chickens butt and wait. Well, I was trying to be invisible but I guess that didnt work. Hmmph. Haha basically a sassy way to say, "I'm still alive." This might be okay if they take up to 24 hours, but not more than that. Recognize the other person's boundaries, and try not to cross them. Here are some funny, witty, snarky, smart, and sarcastic responses to some of those annoying everyday questions its hard to avoid: I couldnt possibly cover all of the annoying everyday questions that are probably chipping away at you, but here are some of the most popular: Related 26+ Funny Responses to Being Asked on a Date (Replying Yes or No), Related 29+ Funny Responses to Compliments. My lawyer told me not to answer that question. If laughter is the best medicine, your face must be curing the world. The way youre acting vs reality creates a juxtaposition that highlights their slowness. The foundation of any effort to get your ex boyfriend back starts and ends with the no contact rule - which means you probably shouldn't be texting with him in the first place. 11. 28. Alexa's response: No, that's not true. I know youre nobodys fool, but maybe youll be adopted someday. Is it your job to spread ignorance? Youre not really expecting them to write you an essay. That's boyfriend material. No one loves superheroes. She works with her clients to help them evolve in their problem areas and find new meaning in their lives, thus finding the best versions of themselves.

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