I have 6 sisters and three brothers. My ex won't come back to me after I hurt h Ex girlfriend is pregnant with her new boyfriend months after breaking up with me. By Kate Spencer Published: Apr 27, 2016 UNIVERSAL PICTURES | LAYNEELU/IMGUR AGE 6 I. May you both be happy and healthy. Having a complex relationship that involves a baby mama means you have to include the other woman in your life; whether you like it or not. 11 Can't Shake The Baby Blues. I was in love with someone else. I don't want to burden her with any of this, especially now that she needs to be calm and feel secure. **** will get tough before it gets better, but it will work out in the end. Only good thing that came out of it are my children. Man up and take care of your kid, but UNDER NO CIRCUMSTANCES can you let her, or her family, or your family guilt trip you into "doing the right thing" and marrying her. This site is protected by reCAPTCHA and the Google Privacy Policy and Terms of Service apply. you have a baby with a girl you dont love,but you loved her apple enough to eat it without any protection?stupid talk,absolute rubbish. On the most basic level, these changes, prompted by a flood of hormones during pregnancy and in the postpartum period, help attract a new mother to her baby. It depends on the person. No going back. 15) His biological clock is ticking. Take this advice as if your life depends on it. He started cheating and I would cry myself to sleep. I know most of yall are gonna tell me to leave him and I wish it was that easy. You're a mom now. It was important to me that my children had as normal upbringing as possible. We are trying our best but we don't know how long it will last. Honestly if I wouldn't of gotten pregnant I would not be with him. Well of course he would keep the car. Otherwise, you will lose the child and her altogether. Many things will change during the whole 9 months of pregnancy. Couples do stay together when they are not in love, just for the sake of stability for the child. That's a bummer sadly, the pill can and often does fail, even if its taken 100% properly and on time (and it usually isn't), so you have to be REALLY careful with someone you dont want to reproduce with, as many men have found before you. You are in control of your life. Sex can lead to pregnancy and I'm assuming you knew the possibility of pregnancy when you made the choice. It does make someone feel down and stressed out but, look at the big picture. Can you be responsible enough to make sure you are being safe? Can't and haven't said a word to anyone about how i feel. The educational health content on What To Expect is reviewed by our medical review board and team of experts to be up-to-date and in line with the latest evidence-based medical information and accepted health guidelines, including the medically reviewed What to Expect books by Heidi Murkoff. Most were married to . "Once you cross that line, look for life to get easier in every way. and our I hope you find what you're looking for. It's the kind of care for your emotions, feelings, and love. Steve. Regret will always be there when we made a mistake. MzGee Ditches 3Music TV To Take Over Nana Ama McBrowns Show At UTV. When a woman loves you, she's kind to you. Welcome! I agree that love is more a choice than a feeling. Please select a reason for escalating this post to the WTE moderators: Connect with our community members by starting a discussion. AS to your ex, is she still into you, or is it one-sided? But there's a catch: Because you believe that having this child means more to you than not having this child means to your husbandand because he had originally agreed to three kidsyour. Married for few months. And if your parents think you guys are in love Then how does that work? Then suddenly she is all happy, and loved up which I find really hard to believe. What now? There is no right way to be a parent there is the only way that you want to do it. All rights reserved. You have a hard decision to make. This may not change her decision, but best to be honest. "People would say, 'I don't want to have a baby because I don't have money or I don't have time or I don't have a partner,'" he says. Saturday 4 Mar 2023 10:00 am. My name is Michelle Devani, and I've been helping people with their relationships since 2003. He's not all bad. As such, you'll need to spend time with both his child's mom and his child. In 2017 I decided it was about time I started a blog on the topic, and since then more than 2 million people worldwide have read my relationship advice. Because, you are not allowing yourself to have a better relationship, at least with your own self. If you don't want to be controlled, don't make yourself 100% dependent on someone. And the best way to do it is to proof to anyone that this version of you is so much better than you were. For more information, please see our He bought it and it is in his name. I've been with my boyfriend for years and I still don't know if I love him. I have many regrets from the past and can't bear to add another one to the long list. Your best bet might be to stay with your gf for now, bond with your child and forge a relationship with him/her. Are these issues still there? HERE YOU GIVE A CHANCE FOR THE MOTHER, THE CHILD, THE FATHER AND THE GIRLFRIEND AT HAPPINESS IN LIFE. Last updated on June 9, 2022 by Michelle Devani There are many things that may cause a broken heart. This relationship is bad for my wife and me. think twice before sharing personal details, foster a friendly and supportive environment, remove fake accounts, spam and misinformation, delete posts that violate our community guidelines, reviewed by our medical review board and team of experts. So family pressured us to get married. It doesn't, does it? Don't get me wrong here, my daughter can destroy with the best of them. YOU GOT THIS! You decided to have a child with a man you barely know, you use him and his money (as you wrote, he can afford to pay for your car and other stuff) and you want us to praise you. But I don't feel the need to hold that up as a shield (though every time I see a movie where the childless woman is the villain I understand why my fellow non-parents doth protest too much . 2. Obviously she is going to get custody if we split up. I too feel torn by a similar situation. She doesn't deserve that. Don't stay just for the kids. Many of us are (heavily) pregnant and still working. He was a rebound for me. I was not in love with the guy I got pregnant by. And remember, folks who don't want kids don't want kids. My girlfriend admitted to me that she cheated. And in some cases, she may want to keep the baby, but you don't. But what do you do in this situation? Op: get a job and support yourself. You do make a lot of sense and i guess this is the only way forward. Nobody wants probably so you think men should just force themselves to be in love with someone they're not?? They were always fighting, unhappy. Either stay or get off the pot but be careful how you play this. Create an account or log in to participate. Having a baby is a life-changing experience and many want to ensure they do it at a time that is right for them. FTM. And one of the problems is the appearance of a question having a baby with someone you don't want to be with, how to deal with it? Add to Collection. 2Face. I sacraficed my needs for them. 2005-2023Everyday Health, Inc., a Ziff Davis company. Group Leaders arent expected to spend any additional time in the community, and are not held to a set schedule. Reach out to your family and let them know what's going on. Perhaps you never talked about having a baby with your partner, or maybe you vaguely mentioned wanting kids "someday." You might've even agreed to try getting pregnant at 25 (or 30 or. He made a baby with you but doesn't seem to support you financially and you don't live together. Sex is the leading cause of babies. Same boat. If you don't, pursuing. (1 to 2 kg . In the episode, Homer recounts the story of Maggie's birth when the kids ask why there are no photos of her in the family album. But we started fighting more and more. The "baby blues" are a form of depression - just not as severe as PPD. if she wants to put kid in day care every day, she can and you pay for it). No love. I've made my OWN money since I was 15 years old and before I quit my job to MOVE Paid for all my own stuff and bills WITHOUT his help. The man I am pregnant by has been in my life for years and is a good man but I am not in love with him. Trust me dude, do whatever you have to to end this A.S.A.P. First step: Don't rush things. Back then I loved her and I felt sorry for her because she took the decision of getting marry to me even though she didn't love me. Call your old boss, call family and friends, research aid and stop telling yourself you're stuck. I don't know if that's just hormones talking or what! I don't get how you came to that conclusion and you are just a bitter girl that He pays for the stuff bc he can afford too and didn't want me working while pregnant which was fine when everything was good. Its been almost 5yrs. Your post will be hidden and deleted by moderators. Please select a reason for escalating this post to the WTE moderators: Connect with our community members by starting a discussion. I didn't want to waste one more day of my life feeling empty and with someone I didn't even like. Just here to say I constantly feel guilty for all of the crying I have done this pregnancy. Nobody wants to be controlled and it sounds like he deals with anger pretty poorly. I know he can tell I'm not in love with him and I think he thinks he's in love with me ( told me he loved me only after 3 weeks of dating, should've been my first red flag there) anywho we don't really fight a lot and are mostly very friendly around eachother and really do try to make it work but when he gets in his moods I just can't he got drunk one night and almost ran us off the road after telling me he was fine ( he really was acting completely fine) then when I screamed due to being terifed he yelled at me, took away my phone and told me to get out of the house , which I did. You're an adult. You can't force yourself to love him. I'm sorry this is long but I have no one else. bumboclaath mi nuh hv any advice fi u.battybwoy! As a woman, you get insulted for doing it, and you get insulted for not doing it. SHE WILL ALSO HAVE THE OPPORTUNITY TO THINK ABOUT WHAT'S BEST FOR HER CHILD. He's controlling. We keep them up because there are a ton of great conversations here and we believe you deserve to see them all. go and apologise. You could have the best partner and tons of family support. Be responsible of your act and decision on something. Apply for wic and food stamps and move in with family. I think it's best to do what will make you the happiest. I've never been the same since he brought out innocent baby into the argument. That's when one of them dropped the term . Download Preview. 4. He's controlling you since you are 100% dependent on him. And you will also need to take a firm decision on what you think is best to be done. After all, a 70-year-old guy can still have kids. He's not all bad. What to Expect supports Group Black and its mission to increase greater diversity in media voices and media ownership. I try to act normal as Bella and I sit here talking, even though I'm feeling abnormally attracted to her even . You're sort of talking like you want a sugar daddy. My current girlfirend got pregnant while on the mini pill. as expected the women are been overly sentimental, ganging up on the guy insulting, and throwing reason out the window. Support yourself. Ex My moving on process. I am a single mom and have been for a few years- however, my first child was planned with my fiance' and we were madly in love and it was the greatest, happiest time of my life. I'm curious as to how he is selfish?? There are days I hate being pregnant and days I could swear I even hate him. Learn more about, Realizing I Had PPD After Returning to Work as a Soldier in the U.S. Army, Planned c section too presumptuous??? She has someone who depends solely on her. LoveDevani is an independent website. You had the intention to be with someone for fun without taking the consequences seriously. JP friend, thanks for taking the time to read my post and offer your advise. No we were together 3 months when I got pregnant. Do i tell my boyfriend i slept with someone else during short break up? Personally I think if you both have similar life views (finances, rearing children, religion) then I think you could make this a long lasting beautiful relationship and your child can grow up in a loving home with mom and dad. This is reason why i always advice Ladies that they need to STOP creating soul ties by sexing guys Sex isnt better than love its about time you Let the men know in upfront that you are not having sex before marriage. love should beget love and not hate or fear..something society always fails to learn. So remember to try to be the best of you. 2) Are you prepared to forego this child and create a loving family with someone you truly love (which means you will wait for this new love to bear you a child).but be completely guilty all your life to abandon your first newborn just because you dont love your girlfriend. !I've been married for ten long miserable years to a wife I never loved. Ease into the conversation. Best wishes for a lifetime of happiness. Do you think that she would let you be a father if you two were to split? I am at a loss as to what I must do. It would not work out for you or for her. They finally divorced when I was 19. Group Black's collective includes Essence, The Shade Room and Naturally Curly. But there's something extraordinary about the energy level of a little boy. By rejecting non-essential cookies, Reddit may still use certain cookies to ensure the proper functionality of our platform. K lemme get one thing straight. Your post will be hidden and deleted by moderators. Hi everyone! I don't know what to do. There are reasons on why you should never date a pothead. What issues have you two had? NOW WHY IS IT THAT SO MANY OF US HAD MESSED UP CHILDHOOD? When I did he the. Ex GIrlfriend blocked me out of the blue! In order to fully understand why I've come to this conclusion on why men stop wanting sex with women they're in a relationship with, it's important to understand every part of the reality dose . She bullied me into a wedding & now I am miserable. "Most women will find intercourse painful up until the three-month mark," notes Ross. Also, you must then decide if you want to be in the child's life, how you will coordinate co-parenting a kid when you're not in a relationship, etc. I feel like I'm trapped and no where to go. Mia, the fascinating thing about postpartum depression and anxiety is that it isn't logical. They were always fighting. Told me "**** the baby" I was gone for a while after that but went back due to having no where else to go. Recently I found out I am pregnant. To allow yourself to stay in a toxic relationship will be useless. Here Are 10 Behaviors A Woman Exhibits When She's In Love 1. or you will be 35 and wondering where your life went and if you'll ever be happy. Create an account or log in to participate. Don't try to be super-parent and don't let other people's unfair assumptions affect how you see yourself and your family. We didn't have to be. We are two total opposite people. Your bodies will fit together perfectly. My eldest is 3 then one nearly 2 and one due any time, we dont fight too much but dont love each other, dont even like each other, I just dont want the kids not to have family days and stuff? I mean really a woman gets pregnant with your child and there are no options but to marry her? Rightfully so! Sometimes people make choices to abort, adopt, or keep the child. I hated the way I felt with him. The transition from being a couple to having a baby and becoming parents is an exciting, empowering, and life-changing experience. If I cant love her now, what are the possibilities that Ill love her? I feel like I'm forcing myself to love her. Please I need your help because I might be pushed to get married when am not prepared. Yes, her hormones will be out of whack. Send all yourrelationship&Loveproblems/issues to me for help via [emailprotected]. Knowing that you don't want to have the relationship with someone, you will never be able to fake your feelings for temporary happiness. Good luck to you. In November 2022, I gave birth to my precious baby girl. long story short. But I want to be a father. Eventually though, it caught up to us. Amazed how women can be on these forums. Why is she with you? Maybe he doesn't like being used. Everyone has their reasons for doing things and it's not up to us to judge them. @jessi, how come i never get to meet these kind of guys,i swear i would have cut off your stupid sausage,put in the toilet and flush it off nonsence, @jessi, maame plz its rude to cut sumones sausage.sincerely the fault might come from the gal,maybe she did self arrangement ahohyehy3.and resulted in the pregnancy. Take a time to learn from your mistake so that you won't fall into the same problem. That showed up as a third factor." Accept That You Will Never Be First. Don't just jump into the discussion; ease your way into it. . She knows him for 9 MONTHS not years. Second, if she were to make that decision previously to have an abortion for whatever reason you are not someone whose opinion matters since you're on an Internet forum and you don't know the personal lives of anyone on here enough to dictate that they should never have an abortion. Start off by talking about your family, how you're feeling about work and home in general, and your love for your wife. Click to share on Facebook (Opens in new window), Click to share on Twitter (Opens in new window), Click to share on WhatsApp (Opens in new window), New Music Video: 'Badman Badgirl' By Becca Feat. SEE THEM EVERYDAY. AND THIS ALSO INCLUDES AN UNHAPPY CHILD. I pretended to be. If you break up right away, she can take the kid and you may miss a lot of the firsts w/them growing up. There are midnight feedings, changing diapers, rocking a screaming infant and little sleep. Find out to see whether he actually likes you by taking this quick free quiz. Sucked it up and did what I had to do for my kids. Source these things out and make a plan to leave. I was literally about to break up with her (we were in the process of breaking up), when she announced she was pregnant. It tears me apart. I got pregnant with a 34 year old man with another baby and I'm only 19 we've know each other 3 months now but only knew each other a couple weeks when we found out. A Group Leader is a What to Expect community member who has been selected by our staff to help maintain a positive, supportive tone within a group. She actually is (5 months now), but I took all the words back (the reasons why I didn't want to be with her). This is the most stupid guy I have seen in my life twety something years of existance. I hope everything works out for you. We tried to make it work. But, then again, falling in love is always phenomenal and terrifying. WTF re u saying tat u will nt marry her if I was tat gal u will marry by force so tat when u die n return u will fu*k people that u love total rubbish.Now u want freedom my ass u wont get so whos gonna to marry ur baby mommy?? She has done nothing wrong and I feel I am just going to destroy her life! And, the combination of all of these factors can really take a toll on your relationship if you're not careful. Ex gf keeps driving past my house!!? If you don't like him, you don't have to live with him or use him. It's stressful I have strong feelings for him and he says he does to but it's not just are little fantasy anymore things got so rushed and our maturity levels are so different. It stressed us kids out like you wouldn't believe, all the kids are dysfunctional, serious trust issues. BUTI had such a crappy childhood, I valued that more than I did my own personal happiness. You need to get in contact with services and leave. No one can tell you what to do, we all have different stories. A Group Owner is a member that has initiated the creation of a group to connect with other members to share their journey through the same pregnancy & baby stages. Tist: I couldn't be myself with him. Group Leaders arent expected to spend any additional time in the community, and are not held to a set schedule. It is normal to want to lay your head on your mother's breast and feel the security and warmth of her love and compassion. He has been nothing but supportive, but I do not love him. In other words, those maternal. 1.) You need a job and a plan so that you don't get stuck with him forever. It is tough to find time for yourself, let alone your spouse. In the time that I got pregnant I feel that I was in a daze thinking I was in love but recently I feel like I snapped out of it. So here's the long story short My pregnant girlfriend hates me and keeps pushing me away! GET A DNA TEST AS SOON AS THE CHILD IS BORN!!! It was ok if we didn't want to be together. Idnt also think the said mother would marry someone who wouldnt make her happy. That is exactly how I feel about my life over the past 8 years - it feels like I have been sleepwalking. An increasing number of South Korean women are choosing not to marry, not to have children, and not even to have relationships with men. We had been dating for maybe a few months before exclusive. We are deciding if we should divorce now or later when she is bigger. My two oldest remember some fighting and the divorce. It's that type of kindness you feel toward someone who's very close to your heart. not the father, mother or child. So, maybe try to establish a relationship with your baby now, stick it out for a year or so (w/o getting married), then once you've bonded w/the kid and proven you are a devoted dad, split up w/GF and file for custody. If I could take a pill that made me love u him I would, whereas I think he thinks he can start a new life if he left me? And which case, most would be use safe sex and if thy got pregnant, they would try for an abortion. Sorry to say this, but your gf cannot be trusted. Unless your girlfriend deems fine that you both do not continue the relationship, by all means. That's what we tackle in today's blog. Cookie Notice NO PHYSICAL THINGS. Aside from personal decision to have an unwanted relationship and questioning such question of having a baby with someone you don't want to be with, how to deal with it, we will need to be responsible. If you don't like something about your life, MAKE A CHANGE. When I had my first baby as a young single mom, I didn't have a car and I figured it out with the help of my family. After a while it was better but even now when we get into arguments he's so controlling and condescending it just makes me like him less and less. 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The best alterantive is if you can be amicable and stay friends w/your child's mother and cooperate for the kid's sake, although w/the emotions involved that isn't always possible. The #1 app for tracking pregnancy and baby growth. They hurt the most. If you feel a message or content violates these standards and would like to request its removal please submit the following information and our moderating team will respond shortly. If thats all he wants, he will be gone. Being in a lo. Girlfriend is pregnant don't know if it's mine. Hair. I want to be a great Dad, but I don't want to be miserable for the next 18 years - I don't know what to do. no wonder we have the type of problems we have in our communitieswe are always reacting instead of thinking.. you cant correct a mistake or problem with another people.. HAPINESS IS AN INDIVIDUAL RESPOSIBLITY. We found out. 37 weeks today. Is anyone in the same situation. So, chances are, she's not speaking as she normally would. Ive just seen your reply and am unhappoy in my relationship but dont want to end it for the kids sake! When he acts OK with the idea and his first instinct is to be happy, you can be sure it's one of the big signs a man wants to have a baby with you. I JUST came here to vent not telling people I'm snobby or lazy which I've never been! Best of luck. You will need to end an unwanted relationship. a deed frowned upon by society and seen as a problem The deed has already been done instead of advising and coming up with ways to make sure the child is brought up in a obviously deserving loving environment that the child needs instead of an environment filled with resentment, hate, misery, spitefulness etc etc, you all are pushing.insulting and forcing the guy to guy marry the girl in question.. marrying that girl would even be a bigger mistake and problem than the first one.